Four Proven Ways to Stop Erectile Dysfunction for Good
I was shocked to read that 10% of men over 40 per decade have a problem both getting an erection and sustaining it. That’s 50% of men over 50.
I paused for a moment to reflect on my sexual journey and rack my brains to see if there was ever a moment of doubt in my trusty steed. Life is only halfway through at 50 and the idea of not responding physically to how my brain wants me to act is unthinkable.
Luckily, I have never had a problem with erectile dysfunction. However, I did experiment with Viagra for a while. I was living in an apartment with a fabulous gay couple I’d known for years. Every Friday I’d get home and, in the fridge, would be two bottles of vodka, a twelve-pack of condoms, and half a dozen diamond-shaped blue tablets.
“Have a great weekend,” would be cutely written on a post-it note.
They also suggested a cock ring, but the idea of this never manifested itself into my sex life. It was Viagra I was interested in. I had this vision of being a sex machine for hours.
The reality was different
I tried the magical pill on four separate occasions. Once it did what I expected, in fact I had multiple random erections for a day or so later. Another time, my sexual partner and I had the X factor, so the Viagra simply amplified the occasion. Once, however, it was as if I’d never even taken the blue pill — a clear indication that chemistry when having sex is essential, even with Viagra in the picture.
Regardless of the intention of any erectile stimulation, the conditions still need to be right and more importantly, you need to ensure you have a grip of yourself mentally and physically.
There is a growing problem, literally
The research paper, Erectile Dysfunction, and Depression: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis explains,
“Epidemiologic studies have revealed that the prevalence and incidence of ED are high among men, with evidence suggesting that ED will affect an estimated 322 million individuals worldwide by the year 2025”.
There are sometimes conditions and circumstances which arise in life that are beyond our control. Spinal injuries, multiple sclerosis, prostate cancer, Parkinson’s, penis injury, and heart disease, for example, all have a direct impact on our ability to gain and sustain an erection. Specialist help is on hand for these situations.
However, many of the things that get in the way of a normal erectile function, can be solved. Like most things to do with our health, you will need an holistic approach.
Giving back to yourself in all areas of your physical and mental health will give you the best results. This is echoed by, The Journal of Clinical Psychiatry,
“Erectile dysfunction should be considered a multifactorial condition that may require a multidisciplinary approach to treatment, especially when depression is present.”
Poor communication with your partner about both sex and life
Long term relationships can become a little stale as roles are established. Often couples forget what made them attracted to each other in the first place. Being brave and starting difficult conversations will always reap results, it will definitely move things along in a positive manner. A problem a shared is a problem halved.
Not being able to communicate with those around you about your inner darkness often leads you into a state of depression. Depression is a personal thing, so many of us suffer. Reaching out to a friend, your family, and ultimately your lover and sharing your feelings is a good place to start.
This research paper, although focusing on discussions between couples and the recovery from prostate cancer, makes many great observations about the power of communication amongst couples about their sex lives,
“Couples distressed about their sexual relationship may not engage in needed problem-solving discussions because sexual dysfunction is a sensitive topic. Yet not discussing the sexual relationship may exacerbate patient and partner distress.
Research in non-medically ill couples has demonstrated that couples who openly discuss their problems (i.e. mutual constructive communication), report high marital satisfaction. In contrast, couples in which one partner pressures the other to talk about a problem while the other partner withdraws or becomes defensive (i.e. demand withdraw communication), report lower marital satisfaction.”
Get some sleep
Having a good run of nights with unbroken and deep sleep will help with your energy levels and allow you to step by step make better choices. Without a doubt, getting into a rhythm with sleep, understanding your body’s Circadian rhythm, and establishing a routine for deep sleep is essential to improving your mental health.
Don’t drink alcohol
Long term over-drinking is a big problem with erectile dysfunction. If you’re drinking 5 days out of 7, then you are in the category of ‘over-drinking’. Drinking too much will impact your central nervous system, which is responsible for triggering the signals that cause an erection.
Alcohol will also contribute to feeling depressed and add to the impact of erectile dysfunction. So, ask yourself a question: Do you really want to have a normal sex life? Letting go of your drinking habit will be a key player in sustaining an erection. Plus, it will have many more positive effects on your health.
In just two weeks of zero alcohol your brain and body will start to recover and according to study researcher Natalie May Zahr of the Stanford University School of Medicine,
“Within two weeks of abstinence, the recovering individual should be able to observe improvements in brain functioning that may allow for better insight and thus ability to remain sober”
Stress is killing your cock
The vicious circle of poor nutrition, weight gain, alcohol dependency, and poor-quality sleep, on top of trying to survive in this unprecedented time, will definitely leave you feeling stressed.
As I mentioned previously, you need to be holistic but more importantly, you need to zoom out of living in your head and reach the ‘fuck it’ moment. The ‘fuck it’ moment is your personal epiphany about your health and sex life. You are not old at 40, 50, 60 or 70. You really aren’t.
In a short period of time, six months, for example, you can totally transform yourself. Step by step and day by day, eliminating poor choices and replacing them with positive ones, will revolutionise your functionality and reduce stress levels dramatically.
Learn to breathe properly
There is one simple, free, and uncomplicated exercise you can do to reduce stress — Conscious breathing. By sitting still for just five minutes a day you can calm your head and your world. Close your eyes and observe the breath slowly flow past the tip of your nose and enter your lungs, before watching it gradually leave. This exercise is powerful beyond words.
Workout to keep it hard
The circle of positive actions will spin faster and faster the more you put into it. Many studies have summarised that regular exercise is essential in treating erectile dysfunction. Start with 30 minutes a day and you will cumulatively build your foundation.
A combination of resistance workouts, cardiovascular, and flexibility will improve circulation, increase the release of endorphins, and stimulate hormone levels. All of which have been proven to considerably help with erectile dysfunction.
“Recommendations of Physical Activity to decrease Erectile Dysfunction should include supervised training consisting of 40 minutes of aerobic exercise of moderate to vigorous intensity 4 times per week. Overall, weekly exercise of 160 minutes for 6 months contributes to decreasing erectile problems in men with ED caused by physical inactivity, obesity, hypertension, metabolic syndrome, and/or cardiovascular diseases.”
You now have a choice. You can help yourself and lead a normal and vibrant sex life or you can give up now. It is clear from all research that erectile dysfunction is a condition, which can be resolved. So, take six months to get your lifestyle in order. Focus on everything from sleep, stress, diet, and exercise. Before long, you will see your confidence and libido naturally increase.
Change your life by:
Talking to your partner about your fears sexually and about life in general. You are not alone, reach out when things get dark in your head. It’s OK to put your hand up and acknowledge you need help
Stop drinking so much, in fact, give it up for six months
Significantly reduce the amount of junk food you eat. Replace it with fruit and vegetables
Sleep is important. Go to bed (before 11.00pm) and rise (around 7.00am) everyday
Learn the basics of conscious breathing — simple yet super effective
Exercise regularly — preferably as soon as you wake up, get it done and out of the way before you have time to protest
The key to your success in eliminating erectile dysfunction for good, is your desire. Not your sexual desire. Your desire to feel better, to take control of the issues in your life, to embrace the tougher subjects, and be ready to change. ED can be solved, don’t be the barrier to your solution.
Photography by ID 157439380 © Marcos Calvo Mesa | Dreamstime.com